Today

Today I am another year older and am feeling completely empty. I would trade all of this success that I've had just to be happy with someone. I would give it all up to have the person I loved to come home to. To wake up to. I am trying SO hard to focus on all the good in my life. And I have a lot. I know that. But when you don't have anyone to share it with, it's almost feels moot. Someone said to me yesterday "you have so many people that love and care about you." So many....not really. I have so many "fans." I have so many people who see the character. And not the me. But I know I've made it that way. And I'm ok with that. I'm just being realistic about the lack of "so many." I don't need many. I would love to have just one that really truly mattered.